Monday, April 14, 2014
Hunting For Bargains On Planet Cheapo/Weirdo
Queueing for DIY bargains at Wreck The Shite Outta Yer Abode R Us last week, I encountered a bearded guru prostrating himself in mid-chant before the cashier. As tolerators of bearded gurus go, I position myself towards the liberal end of the chance kick at a bogus holy man spectrum, and moved to step over the guy.
“Wanton chocolate! Temporal versimilitude!” he cried.
Presuming this to be a discount coupon offer code, I shamelessly repeated his words to the checkout girl while waving a top-of-the-range blister pack of rawlplugs at her. That’s how it goes with bearded gurus: one minute you’re tactfully avoiding them for fear of witnessing an embarrassing divine non-intervention, the next, you’re in cahoots regarding the quest for the bargain Inevitable.
There’s a moral to this story somewhere, but it’s Monday morning.
Perhaps I’d better pass on this one and do something practical and useful, like eating a nutritious biscuit or catching up on old episodes of Cash In The Attic...