Sunday, December 1, 2013

Countdown To Christmas 1

    Advent is upon us, like an overweight wrestler body splashing his abdominal excess onto the fragile skull of a Kwissmuss wobin.

    In the Christian calendar, Advent is a festival to rival Lent or Easter — or the Butt-crack Spatula Attack of July to September favoured by some Catholics and most deranged Branch Davidians — and this year I plan to celebrate the run up to Christmas by running down the concept of goodwill altogether via a series of festivity-themed toons.

    Think of it as the equivalent of those great little calendars you used to open up as a kid, with windows full of pictures and chocolates and joy and love and merriment.

    Then forget all of that.

    You know the score: there will be knob jokes.

    Anyhow, to kick off the countdown to the arrival of the fat man (“he who did have every child’s dream in a half Nelson, and more cellulite than a liposuction clinic waste disposal pipe slushing around his bloodstream”), here’s toon #1...

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