Sunday, April 29, 2012
Shower? April Has Been A Debacle...
April has been such an odd month this year.
In the recent past we’ve been treated to a run of decent Aprils — versions of the beginning of spring which seemed like the tail end of summer, complete with all the mandatory hot pant romping. If memory serves me correctly, last year even boasted a royal wedding (complete with all the mandatory hot pant pomping).
Not so this time around.
I began the month in conference mode, affording myself the opportunity to spend rather too long in the company of like-minded individuals with whom I have nothing in common. For three long days and three even longer nights we were cooped up together in a crumbling private school to make Hogwarts seem embarrassingly post-post-modern, suffering taps which failed to run and (thanks to the bloody heating) noses which ran big time. The best part? It shat it down — like some torrential hell had been visited upon us for the duration of our stay.
My understanding of the rules of torrential hell is that once the allotted Hades Period is over, the torrenting ceases and everyone goes back to their carefree new millennial cruisitude.
So why is it still shitting it down?
I’ve had to break out the canoe to go to the supermarket, and though we’re told the water table is still so low that droughts continue to be inevitable, there are plenty of garden chairs floating about in my garden, thank you very much.
This is the last time I buy a discounted April from a monopoly vendor...