Name That Whirl Post

This is your big chance to do some good in the world — and though you may wish to crochet a special costume to wear, either while doing the good or simply during the preparatory reflection phase, such gay theatricals are not necessary and may actually result in you being locked in a cave with an ogre.

Or something like that.

I’m off on my merry hols in a couple of weeks (on which, more later), but thanks to the spate of phenomenally hot weather recently, I’ve been less inclined (no pun intended) to flop my backside in my writing chair and do that quartered octopus thing with my arms that results in onscreen text via the keyboard interface in a terribly inspired way. Without help, I’m destined to write the literary equivalent of prunes and custard before I go away — a fate which fills me with all the horror you’d expect for a man whose past...no...no...I won’t go there. Prunes. Aaaaack.

So — let me have your would-be Whirl post titles and I’ll honour the one I consider the best/most fun/rudest/easiest/whatever.

Leave your post titles in the comments trail and I’ll choose from what I find sometime round noon GMT Thursday with a view to posting over the weekend. Multiple entries are positively encouraged.