Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Old Enough To Be A Grandparent, Too Young To Blight The Globe With Arch-Lich Devilry...


And so, my marketing demographic transforms. Goodbye Friends DVDs and invitations to suck Liam Gallagher live on stage. Hello incontinence pants and discount fonts on headstones.


Oddly enough, for someone who cried over a curry when he hit thirty (the vanity of youth — appalling!), I’m surprisingly even-tempered about this current installment in my steady slide towards decay.

As ever, life could be better in a variety of large and small ways, but equally, it could be much worse. And having outlived Elvis, Hendrix and Jim Morrison, I might actually have something to say about life’s passage other than “I disappeared up it, then died.”

So how do I feel? And more to the point, am I still able to function without the aid of a rocksteady factotum?

All I know is that right now, I have a beaming smile on my face that could pass for a couple of leaping whales viewed through a Neptunian viz-o-scope (though you’d have to get the angle just right — which is tricky if your body temperature is capable of melting diamonds). What can I say? The sun is out, the Pelforth Brune is chilling and I’m blessed with the best bunch of blog visitors on the net. Who could fail to be glad?

More fundamentally,* I still have all of my teeth and most of my hair, and I don’t have three of what ought to be a pair or none of the necessarily singular. My skin isn’t too far past the baby’s bottom stage in terms of silky softness (apart from my armpits, which is just as well, or I’d be seriously weird) and despite the odd fleck of grey and a few unsightly nasal buboes from which my lungs are wont to swing like bloodied bagpipes whenever my oxygen allergy kicks in, I can’t complain. On balance, I’m managing considerably better than Shane McGowan.

Time to go. Sounds like Son of Whirl is about to rise early from his heap of cuddlies to festoon me with crap gifts...



* baby

12 comments:

fairyhedgehog said...

Does this mean it's your birthday today?

Happy Birthday Whirl. I hope your crap gifts are all good ones!

freddie said...

It sounds like you just had a birthday. Hope it was a great one!

writtenwyrdd said...

So, is this happy birtday? If so, happy birthday, Whirl.

I hope you're getting some sunny weather today. We are finally above freezing at night and I hope it'll stay that way.

Bevie said...

Did someone just have a birthday or something?

I quit caring about my age when I realized I was too old to ever play professional baseball. For the next eighteen years I was never sure how old I was. Then Son was born. Now it's easy. I just take his age and add forty. For some reason his age is important to me.

Natalie said...

Happy birthday! I think;)

Kiersten said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

I'm glad you're happy about it. I see nothing wrong with getting a year older, considering that it happens every single year whether we want it to or not.

I hope you have a perfectly lovely day with your perfectly lovely family!

Ello said...

Hope you have an awesomely spectacular birthday! Behold the power of the Earth Day birthday!

Whirlochre said...

Thanks, all.

9pm and just in. Nibbled huge birthday tea with lemon cake and downed a few beers.

Now watching rubbish TV with nibblies & coming to check you all out...

Sarah Laurenson said...

Happy Belated Birthday, oh master of the written word.

Robin S. said...

Hey- happy birthday, belatedly!

Whirlochre said...

Still eating the cake...

JaneyV said...

I've just noticed that I've missed a pile of your posts! Yikes!

Happy Birthday Whirl. Sorry I'm so late. (Unfortunately this is quite typical of me). Hope your day was FANTASTIC. I've just been home to Ireland for a joint birthday party for two of my sisters. All I can say is I'm glad I don't live in Ireland. It would probably kill me!

Hope your day was that good!