Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Slap My Wrists, Spank My Bottom, I'm Guilty, Guilty, Guilty


Quality Complaint

Recently I won a competition over here at Abyss Shrinks Back. I was promised a crap, crap, crap prize.

Unfortunately the prize I received was not crap, crap, crap at all. Or crap, crap. Or actual crap, which I half expected, having some prior knowledge of the ways of this Mr Ochre via my good friend, the highly intelligent and inspirational McKoala.

The only property my prize shared with actual crap was the colour. My prize was chocolate.

Now, in whose book could this ever be described as crap, crap, crap? I understand that Mr Ochre is a gentleman of slightly peculiar tastes, but even so.

This has led me to become slightly concerned about the judgment of Mr Ochre. A brief perusal of his previous posts has not reassured me. In fact, the most sane postings here appear to be those of his cat, Geoff. Geoff, of course, is another example of poor description, being a girl cat with a boy cat's name. One can only hope that Son of Mr Ochre's interest in adding appendages does not lead to inappropriate use of a carrot in an attempt to make Geoff match her description.

As for the chocolate, I fear I will have to take my own steps to make it match the description of crap, crap, crap.

Yours sincerely

Shona Snowden

9 comments:

Geoff said...

Well said, that ired lady.

JaneyV said...

I once posted a little box of after eights from Germany to Ireland in summer time. My friend got an envelope of brown and white goo. How did you manage to post chocolate to the (currently) hottest country in the world with it still being recognisable as chocolate?

Personally were I Ms Snowden I would be very relieved that your interpretation of crap wasn't all that accurate. - Know what I'm saying?

Bevie said...

"As for the chocolate, I fear I will have to take my own steps to make it match the description of crap, crap, crap."

Not exactly the picture I was hoping to start my day with. [smiles]

Natalie said...

I'm surprised Mr. Ochre didn't melt it, put into special molds that looked like crap, and then send it.

Too much work? Maybe.

Kiersten said...

Well, knowing this, I'm relieved I didn't win! (She said, banging her head against the counter and weeping.)

Geoff said...

Mr Ochre???

What is this?

Reservoir Cats?

AC said...

Reservoir Cats!!

This made my day :)

writtenwyrdd said...

"As for the chocolate, I fear I will have to take my own steps to make it match the description of crap, crap, crap."

Well, that's one way to be creative. I suppose, at bottom, we are all alchemists...

Robin S. said...

Nah. Reservoir Dawgs.

This is a hoot, you two.