Thursday, July 10, 2008

Hal's Kitchen


Further vocal delights abound thanks to the miraculous force of nature we know and love as
Robin S.

I'm here again with one of the many kitchen scenes from my WIP. I could have gone for more exotic locations like tornado-tossed ravines and sub-Plutonic strip clubs, I know — but if you've ever stayed up till morning at an all-nite party, you'll know the best place to be long after the booze has been drunk, the floozies shagged and the loudmouths vomit-lined of mouth is...the kitchen.

Did I mention Robin S?

If you head over to her delicious blog here, you ought to find a burgeoning list of other writers announcing their vocal treats in her latest comment trail. If not — demand a refund and sulk like a petulant child.

37 comments:

JaneyV said...

Ooh you should get your ass on Radio 4 and read the Book At Bedtime. This was brilliant. Who's the food for though! Intriguing and, as always, so funny. You're a gifted man WO.

I had no idea there were strip clubs underneath Pluto. You live and learn…live and learn!

Whirlochre said...

Who's the food for though

Oh, you plot spotter, you.

Regarding those Plutonian strip clubs, my friends in the world of universe-conquering space bugs assure me it takes the goils a good 157 years to their kit off — but that's genetically modified self-replicating genital polyps for you.

Kiersten said...

Oh, Whirl. I remembered last night that I'd get to hear this today, and I was so excited. You didn't disappoint.

Love the scene, love the voice. That is all.

Natalie said...

Your voice it better than I remembered it. Sigh. And let's not forget the passage. Wow.

You read so well.

Whirlochre said...

Hurrah!

pjd said...

What Jane said. Delightful to listen to this. "Like ketchup on chips. Ah! The dismembered fingers!" This is, I think, everything I need to know about the characters.

Whirlochre said...

Thanks Pete — it's important the relationship between these two twazzocks is established from the outset.

freddie said...

Ah! Love this! What happens next!?

Whirlochre said...

Further petulant bickering and a feast of bloodshed.

Kiersten said...

Is this from the same piece that your earlier snippet was?

writtenwyrdd said...

I love your plummy tones, but hate to listen to prose. I can't follow what is going on unless I'm reading it.

Some really funny stuff in there, though!

Robin S. said...

Oh my god- I've been DYING to get here and listen to you and I wasn't even remotely disappointed.

Damn.

If I sounded like you I would never have to have sex with anyone else, ever, because I could just look in the mirror and talk some, and have sex with myself. If I were a man.

Anyway - have I mentioned that I love this? The precociousness and the manholes and the garnish definition et al.

Please don't take this off, 'cause I'll be listening in again...

McKoala said...

Again, I am amazed by the voice. The tone, the mood, the judicious use of pauses.

I become more and more certain you are an out-of-work actor, concealed behind the mud and cowpats of your country retreat.

Robin S. said...

P.S. Love the title of the post, too, by the way.

pacatrue said...

It's almost as if the guy who leads us Americans through the life cycles of the African wildebeest suddenly lead us to strip clubs instead. Hard to beat that.

ril said...

Just so professional. Clearly an acTOR, right? You really bring the story to life and make your words wriggle with uncanny vibrancy. So very well done.

Whirlochre said...

Thanks dudes.

And — nice to see a big fluffy quadruped hopping around in the comment trail.

ril said...

Yeah. Paca was here too.

Kiersten said...

Yeah, Whirl's reading kind of makes me want to take my pathetic turbo-voice and crawl under a desk. Or just speak Spanish for the rest of my life.

Really, can you read something on a weekly basis?

Whirlochre said...

Hey Ril — apols for not saying hi. I normally do when someone drops in for the first time but I'm busy combining blogging, shaving and packing for my hols so you slipped through the net. Anyhow — good morning/night. Indeed — do they actually have time in Japan?

Also, K — yes, all these snippets are from the same source, and I'm hoping to post more Poddies over the next few months.

Shona Snowden said...

Note how he's dodging the actor remarks. Hmmm.

Whirlochre said...

Hi Shona

Think of it as me quoting Hamlet in both scenes from Waiting For Godot...

Kiersten said...

Here's what I've gleaned about Whirl (and now he's creeped out--maybe I really AM stalking him...).

At one point he was a "struggling actor" and may or may not still be.

He has a cat. And possibly two children. Or maybe he just thinks of his cats as children, which would make his claim of being a stay-at-home dad for a few years rather odd. But maybe he has very demanding cats. Now that I think about it, the whole cats-as-children aspect is rather creepy considering his references to offspring. Now I just really hope he has actual kids.

He is cool (see the My Bloody Valentine post).

Also, he's probably a pre-op transsexual lesbian.

Whirlochre said...

Rippling muscles — don't forget the rippling muscles.

Shona Snowden said...

I've always believed that life is too short to wait for Godot. That's a part of my life I'll never get back.

McKoala said...

Kiersten, you are scaring me...

Kiersten said...

Yes, but allegedly I don't know what you look like.

Aside from the pink striped socks.

Kiersten said...

Also, I hope you're having a fantastic holiday! And I love how British you are, and that you call it a holiday and not a vacation. It just sounds so much more festive.

Whirlochre said...

Pavement!

Tomaaaaaaato!

Leeeever!

Advertissssment!

My — I'm feeling British this morning.

Kiersten said...

Lucky you. I wish I could wake up and feel British. I usually just feel tired.

And McK, what was scary? Most of the time when I'm being scary I know why...

writtenwyrdd said...

Funny, from an offhand comment you posted somewhere once, I thought you might be a doctor or other medical professional. But a struggling actor? I missed that one.

Whirlochre said...

Me too.

Sarah Laurenson said...

Wonderful, WO! As always, but even nicer with the British accent.

Robin S. said...

Hey. Just got back in from our weekend away.

Amazing that you're blogging along on vacation.

You'd miss us, wouldn't ya?

Well, that's OK, 'cause we'd miss you, too.

Phoenix said...

I'm so glad your voice thing works with my firewall thing. An absolute delight listening to you. I hope you do many, many more poddy casts for your growing fan base! Hope you're enjoying your holiday (please don't drown).

Whirlochre said...

Hi Phoenix.

sylvia said...

Ohhhh, I forgot how lovely your voice is. Now I have to find something to do it justice.

*ponder*