Friday, June 13, 2008

The Giraffe Hair Counter / Shoe



In my last post, I mentioned that I’d invented curtains. To this day I’ve received no royalties, but in spite of this, I’m no more bitter and twisted than can be expected for a man who now strangles two swans daily and whose hourly salivations of froth can be decanted by the gallon.


The indescribably furry McKoala notes in the previous comment trail that she invented bookshelves, and I'm guessing that, like me, she is not alone in her spectacularly mock-eureka creation of things that already exist.

“If it didn’t exist, you’d have to invent it,” as they say.

So, assuming the entire world is obliterated in an instant and the human race cast into oblivion, and then, eons later, an identical planet Earth emerges from the ether and there’s all that fucking about with the snake, the apple and the one working iPod, is there anything, second time around, that wouldn’t, shouldn’t or couldn’t get invented?

7 comments:

writtenwyrdd said...

Personally, I think religion is something the next go-round of humanity might experiment with never inventing.

Robin S. said...

I'm with WW. I think organized religion is on eof the most harmful divisive pieces of planetary fiction mankind has ever come up with. We're past it now - or certainly should be- and yet, not.

That, and informercials, and shopping channels. Blechhhhhhh.

Whirlochre said...

I thought shopping channels were a form of organised religion.

Kiersten said...

Nice one, WO ; )

I've been trying to think of something, but all I can come up with are leaf blowers. Hate the dang things.

blogless troll said...

Those little twisty wiry things that fasten kids' toys to their packaging. Or the Federal Reserve. It's a toss up.

JaneyV said...

Estate agents or as our American brethren call them, Realtors.

Waxing - I think we would benefit from being hairier.

Tobacco based products.

Whirlochre said...

Hi JaneyV

Nice to see someone from the UK out here in this neck of cyberspace.

I'll certainly go with estate agents, whatever they're called.

Actually, no — that sounds like a proposition, doesn't it?

Waxing, however, I'd have to keep — if only to use as a worthy foil to 'lyrical'.